You don’t have to make all your choices at 20

You don’t have to make all your choices at 20

Don’t ask your college graduate what they want to do with their life. How could they possibly know?

By Kari Fulmek

My three daughters were born just a year apart from each other, so for three consecutive years, one of them was packing up and leaving the family home.

One wanted to travel after a time at university and then decided she would join me in my business. One wanted to be a nurse and one wanted to teach. All of these choices seemed like great options.

But I don’t expect they have to let these choices stand for the rest of their lives.
After a decade or two doing a job, it is not uncommon that we suddenly discover it isn’t where we want to be anymore.

We can no more expect a 20-year-old to tell us what they want to work at for the rest of our life than we can ask a two-year-old to pick the courses they want at university.

To live authentically, we need to keep ourselves open to the changes that happen within ourselves and outside in our world.

A few people on this planet have such an amazing gift in a certain area of life that it guides them as their purposeful work through all of life’s phases.

For most people, finding our passion and our purpose is a road that suddenly changes and takes us down a new direction.

I loved my career in direct sales when I was starting out, but over time I got the uneasy feeling that this was not my work destination. I was helping women on the outside, but was it really helping them on the inside? It took another lengthy work experience after that that I loved and then considered I had to move again before I realized that the one constant in my life was my love of horses.

I remember thinking there should be a sign to guide me to what I was supposed to do. I was just entering my 40s and I still didn’t know for sure what I wanted to do in life.

A chance look through a horse magazine and an advertisement for an Equine Assisted Learning program was my sign. I also wanted to run my own business.

I began to move forward with my training.

For me, as for many people, I couldn’t just run out and quit my income source and throw myself into my new passion. I had to do it in steps and stages, and that’s okay, because every step took me closer to my destination of starting Equine Connection.

My first experiences didn’t spell instant success. But when your sense of purpose becomes strong, you can’t abandon it. It may not be the idea that is wrong, but the execution of it.
For myself, I needed more training and then my options became clear. You may need space or time or financial support to achieve your dream.

Just remember that you are not alone if you are not sure what your special gift is and how to use it. You may be able to get clarity through equine assisted learning or other methods of self-realization.

If you are patient, it will come to you and when it does, it all falls into place.

Kari Fulmek is the author of “Two Weeks to Empowerment: How to take charge of your life and find your true purpose” and the founder and owner of Equine Connection – The Academy of Equine Assisted Learning Inc. She is a Certified Master EAL Instructor and a Certified EAL Facilitator. From her base near Calgary, AB in the foothills of Canada’s Rocky Mountains, she travels the globe to empower clients. To learn more about Kari, visit her website at:

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